Swimming to the Surface

For anyone who has wondered, I have been dealing with a number of issues which have caused me to implode mentally and emotionally. It's shocking to see that it has been nearly three months since I have written. I didn't realize that I had been "out of it" for so long.

I took a much-needed medical leave from work over the last month to destress and move towards an improved state of mind. You would think that being on the treadmill would have helped to stave off a stress-induced meltdown, but alas, it did not. It's almost as if my body rebelled from my attempts to alleviate stress until I finally shut down completely.

Thankfully, with the help of modern day pharmaceuticals, I finally feel like I am resurfacing from a dark abyss and beginning to see the light at the surface and am swimming upward preparing to fill my lungs with a deep gulp of fresh, clean air. Yep, I think I'm going to make it.

So what now? The honest answer is I don't know. For the next month I am going to be working four hours a day to ease back into work. In addition, I am putting things in storage to lease my three bedroom home for rental property and moving in with my mom for the next six months (at least) while I decide what my next step will be - getting a one-bedroom home here, moving somewhere else, rededicating myself to my current job, changing careers. All is undecided at the moment; for now I'm taking things a day at a time and looking for a God-wink to steer me in the right direction. Right now, the only direction I have is up - swimming to the surface.